Ambrose Bierce Quotes

Ambrose Bierce

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Ability is commonly found to consist mainly in a high degree of solemnity.

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Age that period of life in which we compound for the vices that we still cherish by reviling those that we no longer have the enterprise to commit.

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Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

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Bore. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.

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Corporation: an ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.

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Conservative: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the liberal, who wishes to replace them with others.

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Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.

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Immortality: A toy which people cry for, And on their knees apply for, Dispute, contend and lie for, And if allowed Would be right proud Eternally to die for.

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Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.

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Marriage: a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves - making in all two.

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Marriage: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.

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